Telephobia or phone call anxiety is a fear of making or receiving telephone calls 01. For people with social anxiety, the person on the other end of the phone is an “inscrutable audience” who could be judging everything they say.

Phone anxiety is common – here are Claire Eastham’s 5 tips for overcoming it.

I’m much better on paper than I am in person.

This statement has made many people laugh over the years. They appreciate what they presume to be my sense of humor. But little do they know that I’m being deadly serious. 

For someone with social anxiety, doing things “live on air” can be stressful. What if, for example, I say something foolish or offensive? What if the other person is rude, and I don’t know how to respond? What if I freeze?

The pleasant and enjoyable conversation that comes naturally to others can feel like a battle for me.

But some anxiety is natural, right? Real life, after all, doesn't come with a script. You can't think about what you'll say (for more than a few seconds) or edit if you make a mistake.

Can you imagine?

"Oh, excuse me, a moment ago, I mispronounced a word. Can we rewind so I can correct myself and look much cooler?"

What is telephobia (aka, phone call anxiety)?

So, firstly, although telephobia means "fear of phones," it isn’t a fear of telephones as objects. Instead, phone phobia or phone anxiety a subtype of social anxiety related to being criticized or mocked by an audience (i.e., the person at the other end of the line).

In turn, someone with phone anxiety can fear being “judged, mocked, or criticized” on a call for a range of reasons, such as:

• Not being able to see the other person’s body language or reaction to their words
• Not being recognized when the other person picks up
• Misidentifying the person who’s calling
• Being put on the spot for a reply, leading to mistakes or awkward silences
• Giving or receiving bad news
• Bad connections that lead to raised voices, repetition, and misunderstandings
• Dealing with someone aggressive or rude and unable to hang up
• Feeling forced to entertain a stranger
• Being seen as an inconvenience (when making a call)
• Saying “I love you” to the wrong person when hanging up

Unsurprisingly, shaming my phone anxiety didn’t make it any better

This fear of making phone calls and interacting "live on air" started at a young age for me. In fact, as a teenager, the one thing guaranteed to induce anxiety was a phone call.

This was back when nobody had a mobile, and landlines were connected to the handset with a cord. Ours was in the kitchen, a family hotspot for hanging out. So not only would I have to interact with someone on a phone call, but I’d also have an in-house audience. 

My parents noticed my phone avoidance and decided to deal with it the way only 90s parents could - with tough love. They made me answer every phone call to the house, thinking this would cure “Claire’s fear of telephones.”

Unfortunately, it only made things worse. I was on edge all evening, waiting for the dreaded ringing to start, jumping out of my skin if it did. Picking up the phone, I could hear my voice get higher, feel my palms getting sweaty and shortness of breath … like I was on the verge of a panic attack.

“Why do you do that?” my parents would ask. “Why are you being weird?” They, therefore, cemented my irrational belief that I was “different” – and not in a good way.

Making phone calls can feel like a cruel and unusual form of punishment

The only thing that made me more anxious than answering the phone was making a phone call.

This put me in the hot seat – I would be the one initiating and in charge, the one who wanted something.

Obtaining a doctor’s appointment was particularly stressful. My heart pounded as the phone rang, and my mouth felt like sandpaper. The receptionist who answered was irritable and had trouble hearing me over the line.

"WHAT?" she interrupted as I tried to request an appointment with the nurse. "I don't know what you want. You're not making sense at all!"

Eventually, feeling exposed and vulnerable, I just hung up.

Over time, I learned more about social anxiety and eventually connected the dots to how that related to my intense telephobia. I understood that my fear of being judged negatively by others was causing me to think irrational thoughts that weren't true.

Rather than force myself to "be good on the phone," I needed to find ways to make myself feel more comfortable.

5 tips for overcoming the fear of making or receiving phone calls

1. Embrace the discomfort

Clinical Psychologist David Carbonell, who specializes in anxiety disorders, writes about “desensitization.” This is basically what my parents were trying to do with “tough love,” but from a more diplomatic and gentler place!

Fear and avoidance are what give anxiety its power. We fear feeling the symptoms of anxiety, both physical and mental. We fear that we won’t be able to cope. Carbonell argues that embracing fear is the best way to deal with it.

“Increasingly spend time with anxiety, to expose yourself to the thoughts and sensations, and allow them to subside over time.” (Carbonell, The Anxiety Trick)

So, the first step for beating telephone phobia is to bite the bullet and make a phone call. Allow the anxiety to hit and let it wash over you like a wave. Don’t question it, and don't fight it. Just let it happen.

Then tap your thumb on that little phone icon, and don't hang up when you get an answer.

From experience, I can attest that this method is very effective.

2. Practice making “low stakes” calls 

Listen to that pesky cold caller and engage in some conversation before hanging up. Ring a coffee shop and ask what time they close, or a cosmetics company and ask which items are suitable for sensitive skin.

You can even call the Mental Health Anxiety Hotline. Tell them you are doing an activity to help with your phone call anxiety!

As well as calling different places, set goals for the length of the call. Start short by talking on the phone for one minute, then two, and so on.

Practice facing your fears in a safe space before building up to bigger (and possibly more public) challenges. 

3. Make a crib sheet or flashcards

I still do this if I have to make a particularly difficult call. I don't mean writing a full script (I've tried that, and unfortunately, the other person never sticks to it). Instead, make notes or jot down key phrases to keep you on track.

For example, write some bullet points for what you want to achieve from the conversation. Before the call, practice saying these aloud to avoid getting flustered or sidetracked.

I also write little mental health affirmations to cheer me on during a call: "Just breathe! This conversation doesn't have to be perfect!" or "You're doing great! Don't fight the anxiety!"

4. Plan your “phone call environment” ahead of time

If you work in an open office, you might need privacy for phone calls. To do this, book a meeting room in advance or go to a breakout area.

I also like practicing deep belly breathing beforehand to help me feel more comfortable. 

5. Be honest with would-be callers

In certain circumstances, if you genuinely feel you would communicate better in another way, it's ok to voice that. For example, I prefer answering journalist questions via email rather than on the phone. I like taking my time and giving the most informative response possible.

Phone phobia is not a reason to feel ashamed, and others shouldn't shame you for it. With a bit of self-patience and practice, telephobia can become much easier to manage.

Sources

The information presented is solely for educational purposes, not as specific advice for the evaluation, management, or treatment of any condition.

The individual(s) who have written and created the content and whose images appear in this article have been paid by Teva Pharmaceuticals for their contributions. This content represents the opinions of the contributor and does not necessarily reflect those of Teva Pharmaceuticals. Similarly, Teva Pharmaceuticals does not review, control, influence, or endorse any content related to the contributor's websites or social media networks. This content is intended for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered medical advice or recommendations. Consult a qualified medical professional for diagnosis and before beginning or changing any treatment regimen.

NPS-ALL-NP-01516 MARCH 2025